Insanity

The words, they mock from the white page of writing

The clarity does not come.

Searing the tear from the last page I turned

Seems a wise girl, would have already learned.

The merry-go-round of this silent madness

Spins my heart on a worn out thread

Can this be real or words within my thoughts?

Maybe violent delusions of haves and have nots?

The secrets, they snicker… silent with whispers

Just below audible pose.

Their smiles of innocence leave me curious

Yet questions seem only to leave them furious

In my corner I crouch, in wait for direction

Yet I know the way to the exit door

Choosing rather the pain I know

To the fear of losing… complete control

The battle wages between my heart and head

Leaving me too spent to make a change today.

Paralyzed in the midst of a nightmarish dream

No sound emits, even as I scream

Am I destined to remain in this place forever

Trapped within the insanity of each day?

What horrible pain will it take for me to stand up and change…

To finally, walk away free, with a life to rearrange

DeAnna

12/2004